《I've learned that the greatest things in life only come when you're falling, when you're holding on at your last hope-anonymous》
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He bruised me again. He laid his hands in me once again. He forced himself on me once again. He destroyed me once again. He beat me. He slapped me. He kicked me. He shoved his disgusting penis in me. He slammed and pumped in me. He released in me. He left me socking down my thighs.
But something different happened today. Something that left me laying on the floor. Bare, naked and beaten. That was, not only did his dirty sperm lick out of my vigina, but red liquid. A small red thin line of liquid slid down my thighs, slowly.
And all I did was stay there. I let him. I let him make me bleed. I let him slap me until his hand imprint stayed on my cheek. I let him smack his knuckles on my eyes and bruise it until it turned red and swallon.
I couldn't even sob out. I couldn't scream. I couldn't for help. I couldn't stop him. If I screamed, he'll only make it worse, if I called for help, he'll make my life a living hell-it was already. And if I dared to block his blows or fight back. He would hurt me and worse...Someone that meant the world to me.
"Mommy?"
I didn't want to move. I couldn't move. I wanted to lay there on the floor. I wanted to die there. I wanted everything to end here. Everything to end now. But that meant leaving my only happiness in the hands of a beast.
With all the power I had left. I turned my head to the closed door. "Evan? Baby, are you okay?"
He whimpers, scratching the door in attempt to open it. His little knuckles smacked on the door. "Mommy? Mommy, open the door." He cried, I wanted to cry too. I wanted my baby, I needed his little arms around me.
"Baby, go to your room, okay?" I told him, praying to the Lords above to he would listen. "Mommy." My baby sobbed, hitting the door with his little fist. I cursed. Feeling my heart squeezing at his soft trembling voice.
Hearing my son cry was one of the most painful thing I ever have to experience. Not even the punches and slaps, the kicks and words he said hurts me more then my little babys' cries. Nothing.
I tasted salt water on my lips. I was crying. I was crying after a straight week. Why? Because my baby was on the other end of the door, crying. Probably scared and filled with fear but still being the strong little man he is.
"Evan. Listen to mommy, okay?"
"No. I want mommy." He whines with a whimper.
"Mommy wants you too, baby. I promise she does. But you have to listen-" my hurt dropped. Hands shaking when another wave of pain ran through my body. Causing me to tremble. "Listen to me, please. Go in your room and lock the door."
"B-But mommy i-is hurt and Evan help m-mommy." Oh, my sweet child. He was only five and wanted to help me. I am a grown ass woman and can't do a thing to get us out of this mans' clutches, and here I he was, being brave when I gave up trying for me, but...not for him.
I would do anything to make sure he escapes this hell hole. Even if it takes my death. "Mommy is okay, okay? Just-just do mommy a favour and go to your-"
"Noo!" Evan cries again. I curse, bitting down at my tongue. He had to get to his room before he came back. He was out there and if he came back, he'll find Evan in front of the door. And probably pull him in this mess. I can't let that happen. I just can't.
"Evan!" I warn, really hoping he picked up the desperation in my voice. "Get in your room!"
"Momm-"
"Now, Evan. I won't repeat myself." I said harshly, maybe just a little too harsh. My heart ached. I hate it when I yell at him. He didn't deserve this. He deserves many more. If not for an excuse of a father he has. Maybe he would be happy just like all toddlers should be. But no-he cries...for me.
Evan was quiet for a while. I could hear his soft breaths and when he hiccuped. He was such a beautiful child, I almost forgot when last how his soft hair felt like. I've been stuck here, in our room for a whole tow day. I'm not sure if Evan had eaten anything. But I'm sure he hasn't, and if not, it only proves how brave my son is. He isn't like his father. Not one bit.
"Evan, please." I begged, he wouldn't move and I could almost feel his hesitation.
"I-I love you mommy."
A tear dropped. I had to stop my sob from breaking down. "I love you too baby."
Evan had just lost another sibling that hadn't stepped into this dangerous world, yet. A single tear, and two broken hearts