I was born with dark circles under my eyes , dark enough for everyone else to notice it before they ever noticed me.
Whenever I walked into any room people would notice my under eyes before they ever noticed me.
It has always been my biggest insecurity.
Most times I tried covering it with makeup, piling foundation and concealers to make them less visible but Instead it made my face look patchy and gave me even more reason to hate looking in the mirror.
Recently I gave up on trying to cover it and let it be. I've been subject to bullying as a result of it .
They said that my foster parents picked me up from the slums . They also say that my parents abandoned me because they felt like my dark circles were a bad omen and I would bring them bad luck. They also call me creepy.
Well I didn't really have much friends. Only my best friend Liam, my room mate Wren who doesn't think I'm a total loser and my boyfriend Ryan.
Liam and I have been best friends since I can remember. He always stood up for me whenever anyone bullied me. Sometimes I wonder what I would have done without him.
My boyfriend doesn't also talk about my dark circles. Maybe because he doesn't want to hurt my feelings . Instead he suggested I get a good skin care routine.
"It would make your skin look radiant and supple"
He would say but I know better.
I'd tried many skin care routine like putting slices of cucumbers under my eyes and lemons .
Many homemade mixtures that I found in the depths of online tutorials.
Mixing different stuff together but none of it seemed to work.
I gave up eventually.
I didn't have the courage to ask my foster parents for any money for skin care products. They had already done enough for me .
I told myself that, all the time.
They had taken me in when my biological parents abandoned me, put a roof over my head, fed me and even clothed. What more could I ask for?
I owed them immensely for everything they have done for me.
My foster parents haven't mistreated me in anyway, they only simply put their children first.
Isn't that the way it is supposed to be?
I was the girl they had rescued.
I was supposed to be grateful.
I never forgot for one day and Aria never missed a chance to remind me.
To her I was a leech living off her parents.
They had already done enough for me.
Picking me from that slum where my biological parents had abandoned me and giving me a good life. A roof over my head and a prestigious university, the same school that their own children attend as well , it was a huge favor. One that I would never forget and one that I owed them for.
I heard that I was rescued when I was eight but I don't remember any of it. At eight I was supposed to at least remember how my parents looked like but I don't. Only a nightmare that lingers . Of a little girl who has to stay up all night listening to her mother being beaten up. This nightmare hunts me most times I would wake up shaking and sweating.
Aria my sister is an ‘A’ list student while I'm not, I'm just an average student. Not like I would be jealous of her success, no , it's just that she never ceased a chance to tell me how much of a loser I am each time she made those grades . I'm not totally useless, I know one thing I'm really good at. And that is drawing. I can draw anything from memory.
Well Aria says it isn't much of a big deal and that I should wake up, artists don't make much of a fortune. Not every artist get discovered. Some their artwork sit in galleries without anyone purchasing them.
She says only education guarantees a future, she was already studying to be a doctor and that future with medicine was already certain. But drawing isn't, it is under probability that you get to succeed or maybe fate could help that's all. I totally see her point clearly but I refuse to be discouraged. I wasn't into arts because of the money it could earn me but because of the love I have for it .
My foster parents doesn't believe in it too so they make me take up a different course in college instead of creative arts.
Ryan doesn't know I'm an artist, he hasn't really paid attention to me and we were dating. The only person who supports my passion is Liam my best friend.
Ryan has a best friend from highschool, she is also the girl who has bullied me the most but Ryan never notices because in his eyes she was perfect and all the time it's always my fault. Both my best friend and my boyfriend were in my school's Eagles hockey team and I joined the cheerleading team because of them , especially because of Ryan. Beside them being the reason I don't really find hockey interesting.
Today our school’s eagles team were playing against our school's hawk team. I prayed silently for our team to win. It would make Ryan happy, he has been training for this day. It meant a lot to him. I couldn't bear to see him looking shattered because the team lost
I looked around and I couldn't find Cindy ,Ryan's best friend anywhere around. She has made it clear to him that she hated hockey game. That is the reason I can stand here being the only person cheering him on , if not she would have been the one standing here. Since she is Ryan's favorite person, she didn't think today meant a lot to him for her to come here and support him?
She never does anything wrong in Ryan's eyes.
The Eagles team won and they would be advancing to compete with other clubs in Kimberly valley.
The Eagles team players screamed and jumped around as the players rushed onto the ice.
Liam also ran to his girlfriend Sofia and hugged her. Sofia doesn't bully me like everyone else, she isn't someone that made people's lives her business and I loved her for that. She is perfect for Liam.
Then I saw Ryan. He ran towards me and for a moment my heart soared.
He wrapped his arms around me and lifted me slightly off the ground.
“ You remember the last time I left you alone at the lawn tennis court? I want to make up for it today.” Ryan’s voice tossed me from my thoughts .
“ Okay?”
“ So I'm taking you on a date to your favorite restaurant.”
“ Really?” My eyes lit up and I gave him a warm kiss but he doesn't return it. He only looked around probably checking if anyone was watching.
My smile faded slowly.
He did that all the time . Everytime I showed him affection in public , he would always pull away.
Maybe being seen with me was embarrassing for him or maybe returning my show of affection was.
