I roll my ankle patiently. I mean I get what he's saying, but it really doesn't make me less pissed yknow?

　　"So, and, let me get this straight, you thought taking my gingerbread cookies were a good idea?"

　　"Well no,"

　　I raise a brow. "No?"

　　"I thought they were...community property."

　　"That's funny. Well now your body will be community property. Kill him, and put his remains in my ginger garden. You can fertilize them."

　　"Wait—wait! Is this supposed to be the happiest day of the year."

　　I put my hand on my chin. "Mh, let's see. I'm a world conqueror, science experiment gone wrong, devoid of all love, hated by all, orphan...mh...no. Not for me."

　　"It's Christmas!"

　　I shrug. "Well, have yourself a merry little Christmas, then, John. And no more!"

　　I turn around look at my screen. Nothing makes me happy. Except...well, maybe not happy. But it puts a pep in my proverbial step. I double tap on the image that reflects the camera I want to see.

　　It's dinner time. She'll be walking at dinner time. There she is. On the corner of Kosher and Jasmine lane. Her coat is close to her chest, and she stares down at her phone blankly.

　　She really shouldn't do that, it's good to watch your surroundings. Not that I'd let anything happen to her. Hell I even installed a transit system to stop her from walking home by herself but she doesn't take it.

　　I'm not sure why.

　　It's pretty affordable, I guess. Eco friendly. Well, friendly enough. I've killed several world leaders, I don't really fret too much on my carbon footprint.

　　But, then again, if I'm gonna rule the world it's gotta...be here. So I try not to fuck it up anymore than necessary. What was I saying?

　　Oh right. It's dinner time. She's walking home. Even though I placed a bus top right outside the diner she works at, and seriously it's pretty affordable—

　　She looks up. Oh. What is she looking at. I shift in my seat. I mean I know it's not me, but...well I get shy. I've contemplated seeing her. Going on a walk and accidentally crossing paths with her.

　　Then again, I stare at the image through the surveillance camera, looking directly at a poster with my face on it that says don't liter, it's not like I can exactly blend in.

　　I really should've rethought the campaign idea. It's a pain in my ass.

　　She gets to her house, opening the door. I switch the view, as she goes inside. She takes off her coat, shivering slightly.

　　She turns her heat up, and starts heating up her dinner for the night. I snap for mine. So, we eat together. No that she knows it.

　　It's really pitiful. But...I don't feel so alone. It's not like I'll ever talk to her. I could kidnap her, sure. I could marry her without her even knowing it. But there's something about her.

　　The way...the way she doesn't hate me. I don't want to change that. If I talked to her, if I took her, he'll if she even knew about this...craptastic creep show I'm having, she'd hate me.

　　I like thinking there's one person in world who doesn't hate me. Even if it's not necessarily true.

　　I sip my wine. She's had a rough day, I can tell. Or maybe it's just because, to her knowledge, she's eating alone on Christmas.

　　She turns on the TV, and starts watching Christmas movies. I watch along. She laughs every now and then.

　　"Merry Christmas," she whispers to herself.

　　"Merry Christmas," I whisper back.

　　I almost feel...happy. And then I can vividly see in my minds eye, the face of disgust she'd make if she knew this was happening.

　　It is disgusting and I should a better hobby.

　　But I just...can't. I just can't. If I could just be someone else, for a little bit, I could meet her naturally. Maybe she'd smile at me, and eat dinner for real.

　　It would be nice.

　　I stand, touching the monitor gently. She's picked up the phone calling her dead beat parents. Like she does every holiday. They never pick up.

　　"I want to spend some time with you," i say lowly. I know she can't hear me.

　　She looks up. I frown. Well it's never good for someone to acknowledge a hidden camera. That's like dictator 101.

　　She gets up, looking up at the place where the camera is hidden. My heart beats. She's not looking at you, dummy.

　　I can't help but smile. She reaches up, touching the camera. It's supposed to be invisible. Someone's head will roll.

　　"I must be going crazy," she says softly.

　　I love her voice. I barely get to hear it.

　　"There's nothing there," she says to herself.

　　"That's right," I smile. "Just walk away."

　　She turns around, freezing. "No one would bug my apartment, would they?"

　　I lean forward in anticipation. "Just walk away. Go on."

　　"Sir?"

　　I freeze. "What do you want?" I ask, eyes on her.

　　"Sir, the country of Kratos would like to surrender to you."

　　I nod slowly. "Tell them to hail me as their ruler or face the consequences. I've got twelve more bombs with their names on it, and no conscience."

　　"Yes sir."

　　She's gone back to sit down now, throughly convinced there's nothing there. I smile, putting my hand on my cheek.

　　"I could give you Kratos if you want," I tell her. "They're weak willed. Surrendered in two weeks. Would that impress I wonder?"

　　She shovels a mouthful of potatoes in her mouth.

　　I snort. "For some reason, I don't think so."