I woke up to thunder and lightning accompanied by a cold breeze coming from the outside my window. I am afraid of lightning and thunder because it was scary for an twelve year old kid like me. I could do nothing but to cover my whole body with a blanket trembling and crying, because in this case my father would come to my room to calm me down in this kind of situation. Even if i wanted to go out and visit my parents, i am led by fear and crying due to thunder and lightning. I was only like this for a few hours until the rain and lightning stopped. I heard a noise coming from our living room so i decided to go down and see if that was my father who had just returned form work and came home late again.
“Daddy? Are you here already? Where’s my gift? ” I said while walking from our grand staircase. I heard no answer so I decided to keep going down and there I saw daddy lying on the floor. I thought he came home drunk so he just fell asleep on the floor but I was wrong, so wrong. When i go close to my father i tapped him so that he would wake up and he did not disappoint me because he raised his head to me and smiled bitterly
“I’m sorry my princess. I really am sorry. I apologized if i did not fulfill my promise that i will stay by your side, until you are young woman to have a husband walk down the aisle and having your children. Please forgive me for the sin i did to you, to your brother as well as to your mommy. You take care of your brother and don’t leave him whatever might happen. i love you so much princess, i r-r-really a-a-am ”. After he said those words to me he slowly lowered his head and there I witnessed the loss of his breath. There i saw him holding a small metal object,looking like a hilt of a sword.with a small lever which produced a loud bang when you pressed just like a water gun.
“D-daddy! D-don’t leave us please !! W-w-wake u-up d-d-daddy ”. Only the sound of my crying and mourning could be heard throughout the household.
"D-daddy P-please, how will i continue my life w-without a father? h-how about s-sean, he's just a kid dad, w-wake up please" Why do i need to s-suffer l-like this? I don't even know how to cook and now this? how will i going to help m-mom? I'm the oldest child so i feel the responsibility building up on me.
"You are deceitful, you said you will take me to the altar someday, you said I will have a boyfriend at the age of twenty and you will meet him, you said you will take care of your grandson after i give birth many years from now but why are you leaving us now? don't you want to do that anymore?" I feel like a pathetic child crying and talking like there's no tomorrow.
"G-gracious god, make my daddy p-proud of me" i whisper to myself while opening my eyes and started to wipe my tears, and there I caught a glimpse of my mother quietly weeping in a corner while no emotion could be traced in her blue eyes.
"Mm-mommy, m-my d-daddy". I called my mother but, she also did nothing, perhaps out of shock of seeing what happened to my father.
Months passed after my dad died i caught my mom packing her own clothes and stuffs like there's no tomorrow.
“Mom? Where are you going? ” I asked my mother hurrying to pack her clothes. But she seemed deaf and no one could hear her leave her room and finally went down until she was close to the door I stopped her.
“Mommy? Where are you going? Your leaving? ” I asked and you can hear in my tone a little bit of fear, sadness and frustration.
“I’m sorry but I can’t afford to stay here anymore. Your aunt is there and she is the only one who will take care of you and your brother. One more thing. Don't look for me anymore and please, be strong, I hope you can forgive mommy. ” She said and then, she turned her back on me and left the house without me doing anything. Here my anger flared up with my mother that after daddy died she would leave my brother and me. Really? I was just 12 years old and i was going to raise my brother alone? Although my auntie was here to guide us but still, it is not enough.
“Ate? Where’s mom? ” asked my brother who was only seven years old. It was as if I had lost my voice and didn’t know what to do but daddy never taught me to lie.
“Mommy left us Sean. But don’t worry, ate will do anything to love you and to raise you alone. I will never leave you. We're just the two of us together okay? So behave and let’s face together the life without parents okay? “I said to my brother while tapping his back comfortably.
"Yes sis I will, I promise" my brother answered me sobbing probably out of his sadness at what he found out.
I promised myself that I would take care of my brother and not be neglected. He who knows what I will understand and no one else. And if you ask about mom? I don’t have mom. We don’t have. Ever since he left my brother and me. And that was the first painful memory of my childhood days.
