Athena Yarrow

Cold, icy fingers gripped my arm out of the darkness that surrounded me, swallowing me like a growing ocean. I fell deeper, and farther from reality, my head pulsing, screaming nothing, but silence. Terrified my end is near, I jolt awake, and sit straight up, tears streaming down my face, my light blonde hair covered in sweat, and my breathing is rapid, and shallow. That was the third time this week I had the same nightmare. Something about the nightmare felt strangely exhilarating, but more terrifying than anything,

It’s five thirty in the morning, and I had to be up at six for school anyways, high school to be specific, it starts at nine. So there is no point in going back to sleep, I decide to take a shower, even though I am terrified to leave my room I sneak quietly into the bathroom. Desperately trying not to wake my foster parents, I take a quick shower to wash off the horror of my nightmare, and try to start the day fresh. I get out of the shower, dry off, get dressed, very quickly, and rush back into my room to lock the door.

Back in my room, the closest thing to safety I know, I brush out my hair, too scared to dry it, I figured I'd just leave it to dry on its own. I apply my makeup, including my heavy foundation to cover the bruise on my cheek bone. I cringe at the memory of how I got it. I get dressed, and even though it is a nice day, I am forced to wear a black long sleeve shirt, and leggings to cover the rest of the bruises that polka dot my arms, and legs. Due to the raging alcoholic’s my foster parents are, they tend to take all their anger out on me, unfortunately. The most recent event was being dragged down the stairs by my hair. I don’t know why I lie to everyone, maybe because I am scared they will do something even worse if I get them in trouble.

I am pretty hungry, but that is not worth facing them before school. Maybe I will just buy something from the cafeteria before class. I start packing my school bag with my homework, and putting my shoes on in my room so I can run out of the house if I need to. I grab my phone, and headphones so I can listen to music on my walk to school. I listen for a minute to make sure I don’t hear footsteps or movement, but it sounds safe to leave. They seem to still be asleep, lucky for me. So I open my door very quietly, and run down the hallway to the front door. I walk out of the house, closing the door quietly behind me, and as soon as I get down the road into the safety of the public I let out a sigh of relief. I put on my headphones, and walk the fifteen minutes to school.

Even though I only have one best friend, and people make fun of me, school is my safe place from my foster parents. I would rather be made fun of than beaten up any day of the week. Just before I reach the school I pull out my phone, and message my best friend Everly Ashford to ask her if she is already there, luckily like always she responds within two seconds, and asks me to meet her in the cafeteria, thank god, I can buy something to eat. Once I arrive at my high school five minutes later, I head directly for the cafeteria.

As I walk in the cafeteria I pull out my headphones, I immediately spot Everly, and start walking over to her to talk. Of course like always she looks gorgeous, leaning against the wall with perfect makeup, and hair, flirting with two new boys i have not met, or seen before. She is always so effortless, and comfortable talking to guys, I don’t understand it, I become shy, and quiet around anyone of the opposite gender, or just anyone else in general.

I slowly continue walking over to her hoping she notices me, and parts ways with the boys she was occupied by, because she knows how I get around other people. Sure enough to my relief when she spotted me, she said her goodbyes, and discreetly rushed towards me in the middle of the cafeteria.

“Hey Athena! Did you see those cute boys I was talking to!” she asked, squealing, as I knew she would.

“Yes of course, how could I miss them, and by talking, do you mean flirting?” I ask, raising my eyebrows while letting out a chuckle.

At this point class doesn’t start for another twenty minutes, so I went to buy a bagel from the nice lunch lady, and some chocolate milk, my favorite comfort food, after a terrible night. Everly, and I sat at one of the tables while I ate my bagel, and she ate her favorite breakfast, a chocolate chip muffin, and orange juice.

“What did you do last night, anything fun?” I asked.

“Oh nothing really, I just had a family dinner, and watched some tv for the rest of the night. How about you?” she replied.

“I just did some homework, and relaxed, nothing eventful.” I responded, I could feel the lump in my throat, but tried my best to ignore the powerful urge to cry. I hate lying to her, but I know she would try to help no matter my protest, if i told her the truth. It is better that Everly doesn’t know, I am used to suffering inside, alone.

“You know that new kid, Felix, seemed pretty taken with you, when you walked in the cafeteria.” she grinned at me, not a regular one either, a big goofy one, that caused us both to laugh a little.

“Girl you know I can’t talk to guys, I stutter, and act like a fool, I’ve made peace with that a long time ago, you should too.” I said with a small discouraged smile.

“You just have to try, and eventually you’ll get more comfortable with it. That, or one day you will meet someone that you just won't feel nervous around, I promise.” she continued.

“I have met that person, you dummy.” I laugh, teasing her, hoping she would drop the subject, and move on, she tends to get distracted easily.

“Everly you have such a nice shirt on today!” I beam at her, knowing full well she can tell what I am doing.

“Thank you, even though I know what you are doing, I will let this go for now, but this won’t be the last you hear about it. We should really head to class though, the bell is going to ring any minute now.” she commented.

I love our little mornings before class, it is really the only normal, consistent, joy I get to feel in my life. I wish she truly understood how much she means to me, she is practically the only person I consider as my family. Suddenly the urge to cry is back again, because I remembered this is not how a normal person is supposed to live. They aren’t meant to feel terrified everyday, the grief of their real-parents death, or the pain of being beaten by foster parents almost everyday. I am so exhausted from living like this, I don’t know how much more I can endure. Stuck in my thoughts I wave goodbye at Everly, and we separate to walk to our classes.