The wind blows my hair as I stand on the Terrace, Staring at the Gate and waiting for it to open.

"Ma'am, the sun is hitting you there in your place. You can wait for Madame Criselda inside," said Hilda, one of the maids with me here at home.

"I just want to wait here, Hilda. The air is fresh, so it's better here to wait," I replied to her while smiling. I looked at the gate again

"If that's what you want, Ma'am, I'll leave you here. Just call me if you need anything."

I just nodded while still looking at the gate. I'm excited to see mom because I the last time she came here was 6 months ago.

I looked around and smiled bitterly. Since I was 12 years old, I've lived here with only maids and butlers. There are no friends to approach, no neighbors and no one to visit other than the sea. Mom bought it for me to live in. Yes, I will only live here. They are not included because they have businesses to take care of. It hurts, but I have to stay away from them, especially from my dad, because he is a man.

What's wrong with the man?

I was raped when I was 11 years old. That was the incident that I will never forget in all my life, and I will carry on until death. Because of that incident, I lost everything I had. I became miserable, and I could not do what I wanted to do even when I was 18; I did not have chance to celebrate my Debut, which I have been dreaming of since I was a child.

After that incident, I became afraid of men and even when they touched me, I was shaking and shouting. I couldn't control my actions. I only talked to dad last year because I'm slowly getting recovered . So here I am, living in this island with maid and butlers for 15 years. For 13 years, I haven't seen the butlers because mom told me to do that while I was recovering, but now I don't panic too much when a man sees me, but when he touches me, everything comes back to me like a nightmare.

So I'm so excited when I heard that mom is going to come here. For a few years, it was like I was a criminal imprisoned because even my studies were just here at home, and my treatment was also just here. I want to go to another place but I can't because I haven't fully recovered yet.

I was stunned when I heard the sound of a car. I looked at the gate, and the guard was opening it, so I quickly got off and went out to meet Mom.

"Mom!" I immediately walk towards her when she got out of the car. She greeted me with a hug, so I hugged back.

"Hmmm, Sweetie, I miss you"

"I miss you too, mom"

I was smiling while looking at mom.

"Are you with Dad?" I asked

Mom smiled sadly. "Sorry, Sweetie, But your dad is not here. He have a business trip abroad."

At that moment, I knew I'd answered  with a fake smile. Dad seems busy, but why can't he visit me just a minute like mom's doing right now? I feel like something terrible happened to the company because dad is not a workaholic.

"Mom, do we have a problem with our company?" I ask, and I saw how my mom smile slowly faded.

"Can we go inside first, Sweetie? Your mom is hungry. I want to eat while we're talking."

I nodded, and we went inside. I ordered Hilda to give us something to eat

While waiting for the food, I just looked at mom, who looked around the whole house as if she had just entered it. Well, there are a few new ones compared to the last one she saw, but the house is still the same.

"Sweetie," Mom called while looking at the household items.

"Yes, Mom?"

"Is the other room clean?"

Her forehead frowned, but she was happy when she realized that mom might Stay here.

"Yes mom, Actually, Hilda always clean the room."

“Good. I'm staying here for three days."

My smile became sweet because of what she said. This is the first time that she's going to stay for such a long time because once she visited me here, it only took a few hours and then she went home afterwards because she has something to take care of.

We went to the Garden for a while because the food was ready there.

"Ahhh, how relaxing."

I immediately looked at her and saw her looked around the place, and her eyes stopped at the sea.

"You want to swim, mom?"

"No, I don't have a swimsuit with me," she said laughing, so I laughed too. Well, mom can still wear a swimsuit because her body shape is still beautiful; even though she is in her mid 40s, her body shape is even better than mine.

"Next time, make sure to bring your swimsuit, mom, so you can relax. I'm sure you're stressed at work, so it's better to go swimming."

Mom just smiled at me, and the garden fell silent. The silence lasted so long that I was isolated and nervous. I was feeling troubled.

I'm going to talk to her when she asked me.

"Sweetie, when is Dr. Sanchez coming here?"

"This Saturday, she will come here"

"Good, I can still catch up with her. So sweetie, any update about your situation? Are you better now than last year?"

"I'm ok now, mom. I can talk to the man and I can touch but only for a moment," I answered even though I was confused by mom's questions. I knew he was worried to my situation, but now I have a feeling that we have a problem.

She nodded and smiled--a fake smile. I can remember mom's movements even though we have been separated for a few years.

"My Mom has a problem?" I asked because I can't stand it.

She looked at me sadly and held my hand. "It's about our company, sweetie. Three years ago, something bad happened at a hotel in singapore where your dad and I suggested that to our business partner, and the news of that spread. When other investors saw that, they immediately took their shares, and our company immediately weakened; we are trying to save, but no one really trusts us. So now the only way is to sell or the ......... MARRIAGE. "

Wait, why didn't I hear that? I always watch the news or read the news paper, but why I haven't hear about that? But what? A MARRIAGE?

"MARRIAGE?" I'm nervous, because I know I'm the one to get married, because I'm the only child of mom and dad but I'm not well yet. I'm twenty-six years old, I can get married, but I haven't even been able to work because of my illness

"Y-yes, Sweetie, I know you can't because of your illness, so we also thought of selling the company and starting a new business, but you know we worked hard to build that right? Besides, you haven't recovered yet and you haven't been able to work yet, so we have a hard time deciding now."

I don't know what to say, but I know  my decision is important to mom and dad. Maybe if I wasn't in trauma right now, this would not be happen.

I don't want to get married because I'm not well yet and I can't do what I want, but the company that mom and dad worked hard to build, that is the problem here.

"Mom, can you give me time to think? I can't give you my answer now"

My mom took a deep breath before releasing my hand. "Of course" she smiled sadly at me again "Just tell me if you already decided and I'm sorry sweetie if I bothered you about this."

"I'll just go upstairs" I said and walk towards in my room. I should be the one who apologize because for a few years, I have been a burden to them, so I have to pay back what they have done good to me.

I immediately went to bed when I entered my room. I was just looking at the ceiling. Thinking what mom was saying until I fell asleep.