PROLOGUE

"Ji!" I frowned, this is so her. She really knows how to pissed me by just calling my name using her voice in a high pitch.

"Tone down your voice, I'm not deaf!" I hissed at her.

"I just really missed you!" She hugged me so tight and ignored my irritation. I rolled my eyes, and balanced myself from almost falling off because of her sudden movement, she jumped at me and hugged me.

"No one misses you Bria, as if..." I rolled my eyes, and I only heard her giggles.

She's Bria Ariane Imperial, my bestfriend according to her.

"So how's Canada? Is it fun? Have you hange out with boys out there? are they handsome? How many guys have you dated?" I narrowed my eyes on her.

"You know how much I hate guys," I feel like my stomach twisted because of that. 

"Ow or does someone flirted with you and you flirt back?" What the fuck is that question?!

"And flirts," I added.

"Oh or those sincere guys!"

"No one,"

"All right, I give up, until when are you going to be so hard huh? You're already 21! And you're not trying to be in a relationship yet."

"I don't need one and I don't planned to have one." First of all, I don't want to be in a relationship, I am not for romance. I don't want relationship, as much as possible I don't want to be involve in someone's life.

"Hey! That's so lonely, you can't stay alone forever."

"I don't care." I have been alone for a long time.

"Oh, let's move on, so why are you here again?" I looked around and realized that there are so many changes happened here inside that 4 years, of my absence.

I turned to Bria and nodded. Starting from now, I will study here again.

Not because I want to, but because I need to.

People are staring at me, recognition crosses their eyes like wondering why I'm here. But I couldn’t escape their sight of admiration which irritated me even more.

Someone walked towards me holding a cold coffee in her hand.

"Welcome back Angelus, I just want to give you th ----"

"Fuck!"

I heard gasps, as my lips parted in shock. Her coffee scattered on my shoes. As my eyes darted on this stupid clumsy girl.

She looks hurt, but who cares?

"Look what you fucking did!"

"S-sorry, I'll just wipe ---"

"Don't touch my shoes, or me. Stay back stupid clumsy bitch!" she's hurt because of my words.

She ruined my mood fuck. I looked at her sharply before I walked passed hitting her shoulder intentionally.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fucking not." I growled.

"Poor girl, she got wounds on her knees."

"It's her fault she's so stupid!" Bria remained silent because she knew I didn't really care.

***

"Hey bitch where the are you? I'm already here in front of your coffee shop." I asked Bria irritably. I hate waiting y'know. I've been here for few minutes and I hate those people who keep on looking over me.

"I'm sorry I can't come. I have an appointment with my dad's business partner. I didn't know about this it's really a surprise, I'm really sorry. I'll make it up to you next time --- they are calling me, bye Ji, be careful okay ... love you muah ! " She finished the call. Tsk she wasted my time for nothing. We  have a deal about teaching her to play guitar. And yet, she'll just make me wait here? That girl is really a pain in the ass.

I have no choice but to enter the coffee shop alone.

I could feel the looks of those people inside, for reasons I don't know.

Accidentally my eyes shifted to a group talking, with a guy who looks familiar but I don’t know where did I saw him. I didn't bother to think more.

I chose to go straight to the counter, ignoring those eyes watching me.

I’m used to this, I also don’t know how they knew me? Maybe because of my personality? 

"Good afternoon Mam." The cashier greeted me, I didn't look at her or even give her a single glance and look at the menu.

"One coffee frappe," I ordered.

Shw immediately prepare my order and handed it to me, I gave her 500 pesos.

"Keep the change," I simply said and walked out of the coffee shop and ride on my motor bike. I quickly drove it through the mansion. I cautiously pushed the main door where I found my jerk brother standing.

"Where have you been?"

"It's none of your business,"

"You are my business cause you're my sister," he growled irritably at me.

"Oh really? I thought those some dirty girls are your business and not me." I sarcastically said, out of annoyance. When did he become my brother? Starting from that day that they pushed me away when I needed them most, they have also taken themselves out of my life.

"What!?" I glared at him.

"Move and stop asking me cause I never questioned you." I warned him.

"I'm not done talking to you Angelus Cua! Don't be rude, I am still your brother  so respect me!" Ceidon blurted out, based on the tone of his voice he was already pissed. Short tempered. That's what he really is. He is good at hunting but he is also a picky eater.

"Seriouslly? Did I heard it wrong? You said the word respect?" I looked at him from head to toe. That as if I really abhorred him. Can't find reslect, all I could feel is disgust. I disgust him.

"Ah! Sorry? I can't see any reason why I have to respect you. You doesn't even deserve to be respected." I smirked and turned my back at him.

Before I walked out. I saw his expression, sadness and pain. That's what I saw in his eyes. But I don't care. I only use him temporarily so that I can have a place to stay. I am just fixing my place and when that is already fixed I will also leave here.

I don't care about them, their feelings or their role.

I will say whatever I want by not letting them manipulate my life. Now, I want to be the one to manipulate them. I don't want to be left behind, to be missed out. I want to be the one to leave. I don't want to be hurt I want to hurt. I don't want to cheat I want to be the cheater. I don’t want to be used I want to be the user and most of all I don’t want to cry in front of them and beg, I want them to cry on me and kneel right in front of me. I wish all of them gone. I wish them rot in hell.

I want them to suffer as much as they made our heart suffers.

They are guys, it was so easy for them to hurt a woman, to cheat on. That's why I hate them I hate guys! I hate my dad I hate my brother and I hate all boys that ever exist in this world. They are all same. Boys are boys, all they want is girls' body and after they succeed, they will left, they will throw as and make us feel like trash.

Girls' serves as their toys. They are heartless. That's why we as a girl we have to be heartless, morelike we use our heart less. So that, no matter what---even if they left us we're still whole. We have our heart to be with.

I went off my bedroom, took a cigarette stick then lit it and went out on my veranda to ventilate. I exhaled the smoke as I watched the sunset.

It's been a while since I started to let you took a peek on my life and I am not yet done introducing myself to you.

I'm Jiyeon Angelus Cua call me Ji, 21 years old half chinese-half filipino.

And this is me, the famous Angelus Cua for being like this. Detached unfeeling, unkind and indifferent.

I've built a wall around myself to protect my heart from more pain and damage.

And I promised myself that I won't let anyone damaged my heart the way they damaged others'.

I don't want to be like them, I never...wanted to be like them.

I am not afraid, I am just choosing what is the best for me. I am choosing a place where I am secured and safe. Love is dangerous, the reason why I don't want to fall in love, so It's better to play safe.

Aside from that truth, is a secret I am hiding. I am not just an ordinary girl.

Not just a 21 years old woman, who loves to hurt others using my words.

I am more than just that personality, I am more than just a bitch girl.

I hold gun, I hold knife, I fight, and kill.

And no one knows it, except those who died under my bare hands.